Vicki is mummy to Alex, a little boy of 17 months, and runs For Luna, an online swimwear website with her husband, James.

The joys of taking your child into work with you….

Our website, For Luna www.forluna.co.uk specialises in retro style swimsuits and we have been around for almost four years.  As its just my husband and I, we just get on and do what needs to be done. I am responsible for customer care, marketing, admin and accounting but it really just depends what needs doing on the days I work. I love it! I love the autonomy and the creative freedom having my own business gives me.

One of the many perks of having my own business is that I can bring Alex into work with me whenever I like. As you can imagine this comes in very handy and saves us on childcare costs. There are never any customers present in our office, and the only people working there are myself and James, so really it is the perfect set up. All my friends are so envious that I get to take my little boy to work with me. It is great but (you knew there’s be a but, right?) you really can’t do anything requiring any focus or concentration with your offspring around….

Baby Alex at the For Luna office with daddy!

When Alex was a very small baby (if you can call a baby born at 8lb 9oz very small at any stage) it was a breeze. We’d sit him on our packing table in the stock room and he would happily spend hours sleeping, staring into space and generally being amused by me waving tissue paper and bikini pants in his face whilst singing half-remembered nursery rhymes. ‘This is fab’ we thought, and planned to bring Alex to work with us regularly. Then major sleep deprivation hit, Alex nursed every 75 minutes around the clock which was…. quite hard (more to follow on this later!), so I spent less time in the office and more time with my sympathetic friends eating my own weight in cake every day.

So, next time I tried taking him into the office it was a whole new experience. He was eight months old, able to roll around the room and liable to put everything within reach into his mouth. He also shouted. A lot. Our offices are above two busy shops and we were paranoid about the noise he was making so we left him at home with my parents on the days I was working. By this stage he was only nursing three times a day so I would walk home at lunch time and breastfeed.This set up worked well for everyone, I had some time to myself (to pretend to be a real grown-up businesswoman again for the day), and Alex spent valuable time with his doting grandparents.

And then last week I suggested to James that we try it again, because surely now he’s

17 month old Alex at work with Mummy!

walking and able to play for a little while on his own things will be easier? Well, actually it wasn’t that bad! James made a fort out of cardboard boxes for him (what more could a little boy want?), gave him an apple to munch on and I set my iPad up to stream CBeebies in case all other distractions failed. Now, I did only pop in to pick and pack the last two days customer orders. Nothing too complex or demanding, aside from double checking I was sending the right items, so we were only there for 30 minutes. But he was very well behaved; basically toddling around the room with his (increasingly manky) apple, singing to himself – excited by the novelty of being with me in the office. So I am going to try this once a week for a little while and see how it goes.

One last thing…  its just a good job we sell swimwear and not anything breakable because toddlers certainly have a fondness for throwing stuff!

Vicki will be back next week with a blog about breastfeeding and some of the highs and lows which she experienced along the way.

Brian and baby Alfie

At Bump Birth and Beyond we have a family centred approach to all our work. We offer a range of classes targeted both mum and dad’s learning needs, and we promote continuity of care, running classes antenatally and postnatally.

About a year ago, we first met a couple called Carla and Brian at a Baby Show in Corby. We have asked them if we could share their story, as 1) it is SO inspirational, 2) its tells it from both mum and dads point of view, and 3) it really shows what we believe makes us different from any other antenatal provider.

Carla and baby Alfie

Carla and Alfie at a 'Wrigglers' class with their friends (second from left)

Now we join Steph every week with Alfie who is now 8 months for her wrigglers group.  Whilst Brian and Alfie do Dad’s massage on a regular basis.

Thank you to Carla and Brian for sharing their story with us, and you all. It has been an absolute pleasure to work with them and get to know their lovely little boy (who looks just like his Daddy!)

Bump Birth and Beyond run Classes in Peterborough and East Mids, please go to http://www.bumpbirthandbeyond.co.uk/ to find details of what is on offer in your area.

We are delighted to welcome the lovely Vicki to our blogging team – here she introduces herself

Vicki and her gorgeous son, Alex!

My name is Vicki and I’m thrilled to have been asked to contribute to the Bump Birth and Beyond Blog with musings, insights and all the ups and downs of being a mum and running a business. I know Steph from attending her wonderful Baby and Toddler sessions, which I miss now my little boy is older! I am mummy to Alex, a little boy of 17 months, and with my husband James I run an online swimwear website.

Before having Alex my business was my baby, I was totally focussed on it. I really did believe that nothing would divert my attention from it, and I decided that nothing much would change once baby arrived. I spoke to girlfriends in the industry who confirmed that they were back at work within 2 days of giving birth etc. My experience was quite different, I found having a baby completely changed me, and have to admit that for the first 6 months I almost totally forgot about the company (thank goodness for husbands!) and just revelled in being a mummy. I didn’t feel bad about it, all the other mums I knew had at least 6 months maternity leave so why shouldn’t I? And James, although lonely at work, totally supported my decision to stay at home with Alex.

Gradually I regained my interest and my motivation (which was a relief to my poor husband!) and started being more hands-on again. I now work around Alex, much of the time from home, and I make sure I spend at least one day each week in the office. We are lucky in that all our business is conducted online so I can work any time of the day (or night) and if I want to I can take Alex into work with me.

Well, that’s the introduction out of the way – I look forward to going into more detail and sharing some laughs with you all soon!

Bartley Lodge is promoted as a family-friendly hotel, and we were looking forward to seeing how it family-friendly it would be for our family – 2 adults and our 2 and 3 yr old children!

Arrival at Bartley Lodge did not disappoint. Easy to find, just minutes from the main M27, yet set in what feels like the middle of the forest, as the entrance to the hotel takes you up a long, winding drive… instantly you feel transported to a much calmer place!

The staff on reception were excellent – they engaged with our children and chatted about our impending visit to Peppa Pig World – it was lovely to be in such beautiful surroundings (the hotel is lovely – has just been through a refurbishment and doesn’t disappoint) and also have the staff be welcoming of all the family members, not just the adults!

They were very accommodating of allowing us to book an earlier table in the Dining Room (which isn’t meant to open until 7pm, but they were flexible allowing us to eat at 6.30pm to fit in with the kids bedtimes a little better).

Our room was great! We were staying in a Verderer Room, which is one of the larger size bedrooms, and just perfect for a family. Equipped with everything you could need, and even a little bunk bed tucked around the corner from the double bed where we were sleeping for the children. Bed guards were provided, as was a cot (as we weren’t sure which bed our youngest would prefer). Even with all this furniture in the room , there was plenty of space for the kids to play on the floor and for us to store our things. The rooms are also equipped through the internal phones with a baby-listening service. Unfortunately, on the night we were there, I was feeling quite unwell and opted for an early night, but it is a great option for any family who wants to put their children down for the night, and then when settled pop back down to the bar.

The quality of the food in the restaurant was excellent. The kids barely looked at the menu that evening and simply asked for Sausage, chips and peas – which the kitchen obliged with no problems (and they were the most delicious looking sausages I have ever seen!!!) The atmosphere was great – I was slightly worried about being in a formal dining room with two young children (who don’t sit still at the best of times!) but they were welcomed and the ambience of the dining room meant that we didn’t feel awkward.  There were some teething issues with the service we experienced in the restaurant, but these seem to be the result of the change in staff teams which has just been undertaken at Bartley Lodge – and am sure these will be quickly resolved, as the quality of service everywhere else in the hotel was first class.

Breakfast in the morning was good – a wide array to choose from, and we followed this by a walk through the grounds. Some more outdoor activities for the little ones would be a fantastic enhancement to the hotel, but nevertheless our children enjoyed having a go with the croquet set, and the Giant Connect 4 games in the garden.

Bartley Lodge is also so close to the heart of the New Forest and the very popular Peppa Pig World. Both Lyndhurst – a quaint town to wander around (with a very useful Tourist Information shop to discover all the features of the New Forest) and Peppa Pig world were literally just a short 5-10 minute drive from the hotel… and being so close to the main motorway route into the New Forest, it was also easy for our getaway once our stay came to the end.

So for any family who wish to stay somewhere where they will be made to feel welcome and special – New Forest Hotels should be on your list – especially as it is the perfect way to take a mini-break where you can enjoy the beauty of the New Forest as well as the attractions of Peppa Pig World – truly something for everyone!

See http://www.newforesthotels.co.uk/ for more information

Peppa Pig Packages

Based on 2 adults and 2 children all requiring tickets staying at Bartley Lodge – 2 nights in a family Verderer room with 1 day Peppa Pig World tickets will cost £437 Sunday to Thursday night. This is a 20% discount from the gate price per person over 1 metre in height.

We have two children – Oren who is 3 and Willow who is 2. Oren in particular had not stopped talking about going to see Peppa Pig since the 2 days before when we had told him we were going!

We were a bit worried about the day out to be honest, as it was a very wet,

The Balloon Ride is the centrepiece of Peppa Pig World

rainy day… so the kids were kitted out in raincoats and wellies.

When we arrived it was a straightforward walk through from the carpark to the park entrance (unlike some parks where the carpark is miles away!) so this was great, as we had decided not to take a buggy, and were reliant on little legs managing all the walking!

As you approach the Peppa Pig portion of the park, it is very clearly visible and the Peppa Pig music is played through speakers. Our children were absolutely gobsmacked – it really was a dream come true for them.

Oren and Dad on a Dinosaur Adventure!

The great thing about Peppa Pig World is that it is aimed at and designed for the preschool age group – meaning most children can go on all the rides. There is only one ride in Peppa Pig world with a height limit – George’s Dinosaur Adventure – our little boy was tall enough to go on it with an adult, Willow wasn’t tall enough, but she didn’t seem overly bothered as there was so much else she could go on.

Peppa Pig World has a variety of things to keep little ones amused, there are

Visiting Peppa Pig's House - the kids were awestruck!

the rides (9 of them in total), outdoor play areas (both wet and dry), an indoor soft play area, and different places to visit (Peppa’s house etc).

What I was also massively impressed by were the toilets – all fitted with both adult and toddler toilet seats – this made our day SO much easier!

A very wet car ride, but they loved it!

As said, it was raining the day we went, and a weekday, so the park was not busy. This meant we were fortunate enough to not have to queue for any rides, but I can imagine it is a lot busier over the summer. Although it was wet, to be honest it kind of added to the experience – the two kids did not care at all, and they in fact thought it was all part of the overall experience – jumping in all the muddy puddles!

There are two rides which you get your photo taken on, and a house where you can also get a family photo done.

This is clearly a park aimed at preschool children – if your children are older they may find the rides a bit slow and the other rides in Paultons may be more appropriate. However, if you have preschool children this is PERFECT as it is a chance for the whole family to enjoy rides together.

Our children LOVED the park, and we have been asked every day since ‘Can we go to Peppa Pig World’ by my little boy.

If we lived closer, it is definitely somewhere we would revisit… as it is, I am sure we will find a way to return (our children will give us no choice!). If it is a long way for you to travel too, then take a long weekend and make it part of that, as Paultons sits on the very edge of the gorgeous New Forest.

Fantastically, we had also been told it was ok to bring children if that made attending more feasible, so alongside my other half Dean @daddynatal who was there representing the dads, and with our two little ones in tow, off we went!

Shortly after arriving at the venue, our little boy quite urgently told me he needed the ‘potty’… so we nipped up to the ladies loo.

While we were taking it on turns to use the loo, someone else came in went into the cubicle next to us, and then went out to wash their hands. All the while our dialogue in the first cubicle goes something like this:

‘Oren, please pull up your trousers’

‘Mummy, are you letting out the water?’

‘Yes Oren, please pull up your trousers. NOOO, don’t open the door yet!’

‘Mummy, are you pulling up your trousers?’

‘Yes Oren, please take your hand off the door handle!’

So we emerge from the cubicle, and there in front of us is an absolute vision in a Jade green dress, Myleene Klass herself.

Obviously, this photo was not taken in the ladies loo but shows you how stunning this woman is!

How embarrasing that she had heard that entire exchange Im only thankful I managed to stop Oren opening the cubicle door while I was sat on the loo!

Myleene had a big grin on her face as we emerged and I exclaimed how embarrassing she had heard our extended mummy & son chat. We had a giggle about it, she said hello to Oren and helped him wash his hands. Despite the fact she was just minutes from her launch, she took the time to have a chat about things, including how she had met my other half @daddynatal at the Gurgle Blog Awards the previous week.

We then went our seperate ways into the event, but within a few short minutes, Myleene came over to meet my daughter and say hello to my other half. This woman has an amazing memory, she remembered my two children’s names the whole day. Throughout the event she was fantastic, playing with the children and being very understanding of what it is like to try and be ‘at work’ when you have your children with you. She could relate to what it is like to be a working parent, the pressures and constant juggling, more than most people I meet.

Frankly, I was VERY impressed.

The event was launching the Yahoo! Bumps, Babies and Beyond web-series, which are a series of video shorts where different topics relating to parenthood are tackled – so covering everything from breastfeeding to beauty, bereavement to sex.

What impressed me the MOST is the approach. Myleene talked about this at length as part of the presentation, stating that she doesn’t believe there is one size that fits all when it comes to all things parenting, and that what suits one may not suit another. Therefore, the web-series reflects this, showing that there are different ways of doing things, and therefore reassuring parents that they can have the confidence do what is right for themselves as a family.

Obviously, this ethos I love, as it sits very close to the heart of everything my company, Bump, Birth and Beyond, stands for – Empowerment.

So, in short, check out Bumps, Babies and Beyond It has a big thumbs up from me, as does Myleene Klass herself. We had a lovely day and I look forward to the next time our paths cross… hopefully though, not in a ladies loo!

These lovely ladies sent me one of their ‘Just nipping out’ sets – comprising of a Nappy Purse, a travel change mat (in coordinating fabric) and a wipes holder.

As you can see from the photo, it is beautiful. Really gorgeous print (and looking at their website, they have some other stunners too!)

The nappy purse is big enough to fit 3 nappies, the changing mat and the baby wipes case.

What I also love about this is the ‘grab and go’ element. That you can have this ready to just slip into your handbag or attach to your pram, etc. As someone who never got on with baby change bags, I wish these had been around when my babies were newborns!

I love this product, and I am really impressed at the price too. Just £15 for this whole stylish set.

Having also found out that this a real mumpreneur company (the ladies behind this set up in 2009 following the birth of their own babies) AND that originate from West Yorkshire (where I also grew up) I am LOVING Ruby and Ginger.

They also do a range of other beautiful products including car seat covers, bibs and toy bags, all in coordinated fabrics!

I think this would make a lovely gift for any mum-to-be or new mum, and it certainly will be on my recommendation list for this purpose. I’m using my kit now whilst my daughter is still in nappies… and Ill be wanting some more of these in other designs when we  decide to make baby # 3!

Thank you for the lovely gift, Ruby and Ginger

The Nappy Purse can be purchased from Ruby and Ginger http://www.rubyandginger.co.uk/

I found this comment very interesting indeed… because she had clearly formed a judgment about what active birthing was, and what it encompassed.

Now, I am aware that different professionals define active birthing in different ways… When I teach active birthing, this is what I define it as: active birthing is about being an active participant in the birthing process. Whatever path your birth takes, you can either be a passive patient or an active participant in that journey.

I have worked with many women who have experienced many different births, but still used the principles of active birthing all the same. Women who have birthed their babies naturally with no drugs, women who have had assisted deliveries, women who have opted for pain relief, women who have had a C Section.

The emphasis here is choice. THEIR choice. These women did not see themselves as passive patients, they were involved in the decisions made about their body, their birth and their baby.

Active birthing can include techniques to keep you calm and lower adrenalin during a C Section – of massive benefit to both mum and baby. Active birthing can include ways of still utilizing position to make birth easier, and guess what, the laws of gravity still exist if you choose to have an epidural (and yes, there are other choices than giving birth laid flat on your back even with an epidural!) Active birthing gives you practical techniques to use should you suddenly find yourself in labour rather than at your planned Caesarean delivery.

Ultimately, active birthing is about understanding and choices… if you want to learn how to make birth easier, safer and more enjoyable then that is what active birthing is about… and most of us should be planning an active birth in this respect.

I’m going to finish this post with the birth account of a lady I worked with in 2010. She writes the most wonderful account of how her birth didnt go to plan, but how actually, this made what she had learnt in her active birthing classes with me even more important… I think her story speaks volumes for the benefit of the confidence and knowledge active birthing can provide.

Linzi’s Birth Story, December 2010

I have to be honest, the overwhelming memory of the first few days (ahem, weeks) of being a mum of two so close in age, was sheer exhaustion.

Willow and Oren were born just under 13 months apart, which meant Oren was also still very much a baby who needed lots of supervision and support, while Willow obviously was completely dependent on me for her needs.

I remember the first day I was left on my own with both of them – it was only going to be half a day but how was I going to cope on my own? How could I change TWO sets of nappies, breastfeed while trying to make Oren’s lunch, play with Oren while allowing Willow to sleep… and what would I do if they both started crying at the same time?!

I was worried, but actually it was alright. OK, it was knackering. I have never been so tired in my life. Up through the night breastfeeding, then getting up and sorting out my toddler, I was exhausted. Then I discovered the massive benefits of co-sleeping with Willow, so she could feed as she wanted through the night. This was lifesaver #1. Co-sleeping was fantastic, it meant I was less sleep deprived and then was able to get up and meet the needs of my little boy.

Having a sling was lifesaver #2. I used a pouch sling in the early days with Willow, both at home as well as out and about. It gave me my hands back when, and also allowed me to breastfeed discretely out in public – something I had struggled with the first time around.

Going out and seeing people was another matter. Gone were the days when you could go and meet your friends in a coffee shop – with two children it just wasn’t possible to keep Oren entertained while looking after Willow, sling or no sling. I became very envious of the mums with just one baby in some ways… and when I was sat listening to them tell me how tired they were, yes there was a part of me inside shouting ‘How tired do you think I am?!!!’

However, although I was TIRED, that was the single hardest thing about it all. There wasn’t the big shock and life adjustment which you go through when you have your first. Everything is just… easier. You are more confident and more relaxed.  You already know what to expect from life with a baby, and therefore you adjust better and more quickly.

And as time had progressed, we have really been able to reap the benefits of having two so close together. The lack of jealousy – Oren simply doesn’t remember life before Willow, and so we have never had to deal with him resenting her. They are best friends, they have played together since Willow was about 5 months old, and so often keep each other entertained. And they really care for each other, just yesterday, Oren let go of his helium balloon in the garden and was devasted when it sailed away… Willow immediately went to get her balloon and gave it to him to make him feel better…

It has been a real privilege seeing them both grow up together. Willow is far from being the dainty little baby now that she is 2 years old. In fact she can hold her own in any wrestling matches with her older brother! They are so similar now, they often get mistaken for twins.

So it was hard work, but definitely worth it in the long run. The difficulty is it now feels like such a long time since we had a baby in the house… and guess who is getting broody

<<Insert me sighing heavily here>>

Honestly, what a sad world we live in where women are so frightened and misinformed about how their own bodies are designed to work. Indeed, women who are so convinced that birth is going to be so awful that they can’t even imagine the possibility that actually it might be a good, positive, even an enjoyable experience?

It is also terrifying how little people realize about the complications, risks and limitations of interventions during labour. There is this common delusion that people think an epidural will be delivered when they want it, have the exact effect which they have already been planning, and all with no negative side. The shock on people’s faces when they realize they might have to wait for an epidural… that there is a chance it may not numb all sensations, that the increased risks are significant… Various evidence shows that you are 3x more like to have an assisted birth following an epidural and your risk of emergency C-Section increases by 160%! I have no issue with people making informed choices and waiting to see how things go, but why would you plan for these increased risks, when you could be planning for other ways of avoiding them and learning things to make the whole process easier and less painful? After all, if you are not in pain, you won’t want or need any pain relief!

Childbirth is nothing like having a tooth pulled without anaesthetic!! For a start, there is nothing natural about having a tooth pulled! It is a medical intervention!!  It is the result of something gone wrong. It is something which is done TO you.

Childbirth is natural. Your body is designed to do it. Childbirth is not an illness or injury which needs treatment, there is nothing ‘wrong’ with your body! Childbirth is something which women DO themselves, not something which is done to them.

It is pretty normal to be anxious or scared about birth. It is ok to be unsure of how everything works and how to help or hinder that process. But in these circumstances, do something about it. And no, I don’t mean going to a class which teaches you about pain relief options! Why not sign up for a class which teaches you about what is happening, how to help your body along, how to make the process more manageable and less painful? Did you know what position your baby in can affect your experience of labour? Do you know what position your baby is in? (and I mean more than just ‘head down’ or not!) Do you know what speeds up dilation and slows it down? Do you know what positions your pelvis is open to its widest, so baby can be born more easily? Do you know what natural things can cause labour to slow down or stall, and what you can do, even in pregnancy, to try and minimize that happening?

Ladies often say to me that the thing they are most afraid of, is labour being out of their control. Indeed, the reality is that you cannot be in full control during labour, but there is a lot you do have control over. However, so many of us are uninformed about these things, that the only thing we think we have control over is when we get the epidural. In my experience, nothing could be further from the truth.

If you want to learn more about your body, your baby, your birth and your options, sign up for a Daisy Birthing class, available all around the UK via the Lazy Daisy website http://www.thelazydaisychain.co.uk/ or if you are in Peterborough, East Northants and North Cambridgeshire area, available from us at  http://www.bumpbirthandbeyond.co.uk/

Knowledge is power… get some